I'll love you never
by HisInternalBeauty
Summary: Deidara and Sasori are complete opposites, both having different views on life. Deidara is in an abusive home where Sasori is in a gang called the Akatsuki. When their paths cross, both don't know what to expect but life's just funny like that. especially when fate put you with a roommate that's the spawn of the devil, collage is going to be such a drag. SasoDei and other pairings.
1. I'll love you never

Hello, My first ever story is up and I hope you all like it. Reviews are very much welcome and appreciated. As you know, I do not own naruto...If I did then there would be a lot more relationships between the smexie men ;)

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK... "Deidara get your fucking ass out of bed now or so help Jashin I will fucking screw you awake."

Deidara slowly opened his right eye, groaning at the brightness of the room.  
"Go way un, try sleep here" the blonde muttered  
Damn Hidan, didn't he know that today was Saturday which usually meant that Deidara would be nursing a hangover. It also meant that today Deidara would be playing at the fort felt club today...

"OH SHIT UN" Deidara yelled when he realized that that he had to be at the fort felt club in less than an hour.  
"Fucking realize what you gotta fucking do today? Good then fucking hurry up, I think I hear your dad coming and he looks fucking drunk as a fuck."  
Of course, Deidara thought, his dad had to come home right when he had to leave, which meant that he would get a good beating before he left the house. Probably for not cleaning the house to his father's standards. What a fucking perfect way to start the day. Deidara groaned.  
"I'll be out in a minute Hidan un, meet me in the car," yelled Deidara.

Deidara jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom to have a quick shower and then styled his hair into his signature half ponytail with a fringe covering his left eye. If there was one thing Deidara actually cared about, it would be his hair... And his art, his pride and beauty. After the blonde was satisfied with how be looked, he quickly grabbed a pair of ripped jeans, a white button up shirt (that showed his flawless chest and tattoo over his heart) and his favourite red converse. The blonde was finally ready to face the day. Now all he had to do was sneak past his father.

Down the hall, make a right, don't step on the third step from the top, it will creak. Go into the kitchen and stop until father is passed out on the floor. Sneak around the drunk and run towards the door and into Hidan's car. Deidara had it all planed out so he wouldn't have to run into that bastard of a father. Too bad fate decided to screw Deidara as he only got as far as the stairs.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" asked a drunk Teigor. (AN I don't know Deidara's dads real name so imma call him Teigor)  
"Well, sir un, I was going to go into work today so I can Earn some money"  
If Teigor ever found out that Deidara was actually going to the art gallery for a show, Deidara would get such a beating that he would be in the hospital for weeks to come.  
Not that Deidara hasn't been in the hospital before because sometimes when his father was really drunk, he sometimes lost control...

Deidara's dad had a temper when it came to Deidara. Teigor had a temper when it came to life so it was not surprising when Teigor slapped the blonde across the face.  
"Listen here you little slut, you don't talk to your father like that. I'm the one who raised you, who gave you food and put a roof over your head, even after you killed your bitch of a mother I still fuc"... SLAP  
"Don't you dare say anything against my mother!" Deidara yelled with such venom in his voice. Teigor was in shock at Deidara's outburst. Usually the said artist had a impassive expression when Teigor yelled at him.

Deidara was just as shocked as Teigor and froze, waiting for the beating to start. There was silence throughout the house, as seconds ticked painfully slow. Once Deidara came out of his shocked state, he fled the kitchen and running through the weeds at fast as he could, and jumped into Hidan's car.  
"Damn, what took you so fucking long? Honestly , I was ready to call the fucking police thinking your dad finally murdered you... Deidara?"  
Deidara had a sullen aura around him  
"Can we just get to the club un? We're already late as it is..."  
"...sure but what fuck happened in there? If he fucking hurt you again then I'll call the services, you know I fuc"  
"Will YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE AND DRIVE UN?" Deidara interrupted, he could feel his anger slowly getting the best of him.

If you knew Deidara then you would know that he was usually a very happy and joyful person, always full of life . It was very rare for Deidara to lose his temper like he just did and he NEVER yelled at his best friend Hidan. Deidara and Hidan were best friends ever since they could remember. It has something to do with Hidan trying to sacrifice Deidara to his god almighty. Ever since then the two had been two peas in a pod, always sticking out for each other and Deidara always got Hidan out of jail when the police found out about the sacrificing of the cat. Deidara just had a way with people, especially men...  
The rest of the way was quiet except the hustle and bustle of the big city known as Tokyo. Deidara absolutely loved he big city, it reminded him of his art, explosive and fleeting, beautiful.

"Deidara we're here so get your fucking stuff and hurry, your already 15 minutes late."  
"Kay just give me a sec un." Deidara was still in a very hostile mood after his episode with his dad.

After getting all his clay, explosive and sculptures, he headed into the common area of the building. The fort felt was really a beautiful place and the blonde was very happy about getting to show people his art, his life. Sometimes at the end of his shows he would get some people asking of he could teach them his skills and who was Deidara to say no to giving them what they wanted? From the common area Deidara moved towards the court yard where the show would be hosted. Breathing in the smell of grass and flowers, Deidara started to get ready. There wasn't much Deidara had to do though. His shows were never planned out and every show was different. The only thing that was planned was how high he should through the art and how big the explosion should be. This was just so that the audience wasn't in any danger but once in a while his calculations would be a little off but there was never any extreme injuries and the miscalculations always seemed to excite the crowds.

"Mr Iwa, your show will start in a couple of seconds so get ready." The manager wasn't sure about Deidara and his 'art' but he was a very famous person for someone so young, just turned 19 the manager thought. Kid did have talent.  
For the next couple of minutes Deidara pep talked himself, he was always nervous when it came to his shows and art, what if the crowd didn't enjoy his show? The bomber was ripped out of his thoughts when the manager started to introduce Deidara.  
"Ladies and Gentlemen, I am pleased the announce that we have a very special guest today so could you put your hands together and give a very warm welcome to the famous artist Deidara Iwa."  
Deidara stepped out into the open, such a beautiful day for a show.

"Hello, my name is Deidara un and I am here to give you a show of a lifetime yeah ." Deidara waited for the crowd to quiet down and once the artist was sure he had everyone's attentions, he threw the first sculpture. Deidara watched as his world came alive. This was his high, the sole reason for his being, to make his art. He watched the crowd's reaction as they stared at the beauty in the sky, the different colors in the air. Deidara then waited for the thrill in the crowd to settle down and started to throw more of his beautiful creations into the sky. Violent colors raided the air and crumbles of clay littered the ground, it truly was a sight to see. Finally it was time for the Grande finale, what made Deidara's heart stop a beat. Deidara walked towards the front of the stage, a clay eagle in his hands. This piece of work took Deidara two months to complete as there was so much detail in the feathers and beak. The wings were sculpted as if it were going to take flight, the talons were hand crafted with little swirls of designs. Deidara counted to three and with a take of breath, threw the master piece into the air. Deidara did the hand signs and with a whisper of 'katsu' the eagle blew up into millions of tiny pieces. The explosion was music to the blondes ears, the colors in the sky earlier were dull compared to now. It only took a couple of seconds for the explosion but that was how Deidara liked it, fleeting.

Just as the last piece of clay fell to the earth, Deidara saw a flash of blood red hair.

It was a boy, no older than him, maybe 20, and damn, was he beautiful. With red hair that Deidara wasn't even sure was his natural color and eyes so beautifully different. they looked brown but in the sun, looked red and at a different angle, looked black. Beautiful. And his body, god, what Deidara could see of the boy's body, it was amazing, like angles created him for their use. The red head was wearing tight jeans with that hugged the boys ass perfectly. His shirt was a red pull over with the black kanji for scorpion over his heart and over the shirt was a black leather jacket. To top it all off, the man had black designer shoes on that fit well with his outfit. Deidara couldn't stop looking, the boy just looked so yummy and Deidara wasn't the type to stare at a random stranger. Let alone call him yummy. The angel must of saw Deidara staring as he was walking towards the blonde.

"Hello, if I remember at the beginning of the show, your name is Deidara, right?"  
"U..Un yeah" Honesty, how embarrassing can you get?  
"Ok well, my name is Sasori ," The man Sasori held out his hand, waiting for Deidara to shake.

All Deidara could do was look at the young boy.

Sasori's face held irritation

"Hurry up, I don't like to be kept waiting." Sasori grumbled out.  
"ni.. nice to meet you un, did you um like the show un?" Deidara was quite nervous, he hoped Sasori wouldn't notice but apparently luck wasn't on his side today.  
"A little nervous are we?" Sasori gave Deidara a dazzling smile that made Deidara want to melt.  
God Deidara, get it together, it's just a boy, a really cute boy...  
"So un, did you like the show? It was one of my favourites, took forever to sculpt that eagle un." Deidara's heart soared when he thought about the eagle.  
"It was... Ok, I thought the sculpture and painting were beautiful but why blow them up? They would've been better if they were eternal and everlasting so their beauty can been seen over and over again." (omg is Sasori occ or what? I'll try to fix that)

Deidara's heart skipped a beat, literally. He couldn't believe his ears, his art should be everlasting? Who the hell did this kid think he was? Telling him what how art should be!  
Deidara had to remember to breath. He then smiled.  
"Well Sasori un, if you think art should be everlasting and eternal, your are truly mistaken. Now, good day to you un, I must speak with TRUE artists." and with that, Deidara turned around and went to some very pretty brunette. Suddenly, the red head didn't look so cute.

So how was the first chaper? good, Bad? should I keep going or trash it? Hope you all like it R&R


	2. I'll love you never chapter 2

So second chapter is now done and up, hope you all like it :) Also sorry about last chapter if there were any grammar mistakes, that chapter was done all on my iPod.

I do not own naruto...Believe me if I did then there would be yaoi and incest (I have this thing with Sasuke and Itachi)

Big thanks to gabrielsangel23 and Akatsuki Annabell-YAOI ROCKS for reviewing; it made me want to put this story up ASAP :)

I'll love you never chapter 2

* * *

(Sasori's pov)

I woke up to the sound of birds and loud talking coming from my living room. Not a good way for me to wake up which meant that I would probably be in a crappy mood all day. Hoping that the infuriating people would leave, I tried to fall back asleep and it would have worked if someone hadn't barged into my room.

"Sasori, Leader wants to see you right now."

I tried to tune whoever was talking out but it was difficult when more people came into my room.

"Fine I'll go see leader-Sama, GET OUT OF MY ROOM!" Sasori yelled.

Once they all left, I walked to the bathroom to get ready. Looking at my refection in the mirror, I noticed my hair was growing longer, near my shoulders and going every which way, it suited me. My flawless skin gave me that girlish look but my toned body was masculine.

Putting on some clothes, I went to the living room where everyone was gathered. Right away, I considered my sanity for getting up. Kisame and Itachi fighting about whatever crap they talk about, something about the latest run I think. Then there was Zetsu was talking to himself and Tobi was being Tobi. We were all waiting for Leader-Sama to tell us our latest clients. 'Hurry up, damn it.'

All of a sudden Pain-Sama came into the room and all talking ceased.

"Sasori, Itachi, you two will go uptown to the Bridge building and deliver the newest package." Pain glared at the two, daring them to say something.

Sasori was the first one to speak.

"I don't think that's the best idea, the cops are onto us and Kabuto has been threatening to expose us, It would be fucking suicidal to go to bridge building." Sasori was in an irritated mood and going to jail today would just be a nuisance.

Pain looked like he was trying to control his irritation. I would probably be in shit if I said any more so I just stayed silent.

"I understand that this is risky but if Orochimaru finds out that we broke our deal, we'll all be in trouble so you WILL go and deliver it without any damn complaints."

How Leader-Sama said it made it final, nothing I said would change his mind. I grounded my teeth and with as much venom I could muster,

_"Yes Leader-Sama."_

We were all dismissed after that so Itachi and I got our stuff ready and started to head out. It took a while for Itachi to get a move on which really pissed me off...Just one of those days I guess.

Itachi and I left the house and headed to my red Audi R8 V12 TDI, also known as my baby. I maybe rich but this baby took a huge chunk out of my wallet but was totally worth it.

Getting onto the highway, I sped up, breaking the speed limit by at least a 100 km, wanting to get this over as soon as possible. As we neared Tokyo I Thought about our oldest and best paying client. He certainly was handsome but also was a hard stone killer and not someone to mess around with. I understood what Pain-Sama was talking about when he said that we can't terminate our services with him, things would go bad, fast. We got to the Bridge building an hour later, traffic is a bitch. Orochimaru was already waiting for us and had a sly grin. This package must be important for his 'research.' Not important to me. Itachi started to glare at the snake and I don't blame him, Sasuke, his little brother, got into some sort of debt with Orochimaru and couldn't pay it back. Sasuke ended up becoming a toy for the snake.

"Itachi, you stay here and I'll give the package to him, if anything happens, you know what to do."

After saying that, I left the car with the pack and walked to where Orochimaru was.

"Ahh, Ssassori, I hope everything isss in order?" The pedophile slurred, just like a snake.

"Yes, I hope you have the money? This newest drug does not come cheap and is triple what is usually paid." I slit my eyes, knowing that Orochimaru would try to pull one of his tricks.

"I completely underssstand." Was all he said as he pulled out a briefcase. Checking to make sure all the money was there, I walked towards the Audi and drove off, leaving skid marks on the road.

(Normal POV)

After the package was delivered, Sasori dropped off Itachi and left to go clear his mind. Not sure why he felt like this, he decided to go to the art gallary. It was the only place where Sasori felt comfortable. Wandering around aimlessly Sasori still couldn't shake off that feeling that something was going to happen and he didn't like that. Deciding to leave, a piece of paper caught his eye.

**The museum and Fort Felt is proud**

**to announce that Deidara Iwa will be making **

**an appearance at the country club this **

**Saturday at noon. **

**We hope to see you there to experience some never**

**before seen beauty. **

Always one to see new art, Sasori looked at his watch and saw that the show would be starting in ten minutes. It was only five minutes away from his current location so Sasori decided to check it out. Walking a little faster then what was needed, Sasori got to the club just as a blonde chick stated her name which was Deidara. Sasori then noticed that she held a sculpture of a bird. It was truly amazing. Such a sight to see. Sasori could stare at the bird all day. The detail on the wings was beautiful and must have taken forever to carve and a lot of patience. All of a sudden the clay bird was thrown into the air and with a loud explosion, was gone. Sasori couldn't believe it, such a beautiful masterpiece was blown up...WHO THE HELL DOES THAT? The red head couldn't get his head around it, the bird was just...just, he didn't even have words to describe what he felt (AN: OMG Sasori is totally OCD about his art and I'm totally making him sound crazy lol) Suddenly the blonde walked off stage and people around him started to clap, the show was over.

Sasori decided to go talk to the blonde girl about the show, he had to admit though, even if that wasn't what Sasori thought was art, he had to give credit to the bomber that her show was really beautiful, the colors in the sky were beautiful, it would just be better if it was everlasting so he could see it again and again.

As Sasori started to walk towards the blonde girl, he noticed that even though she had long hair and the bluest eyes he had ever seen, she had a muscular and toned body, broad shoulders and a flat but smooth chest. This girl was a man! Sasori's pants started to get a little tight but pushed that aside as he noticed that the angle was staring at him...Wait angel? where did that come from? Sasori's legs started to walk towards the bomber.

"Hello, if I remember at the beginning of the show, your name is Deidara, right?" Sasori was feeling very shy all of a sudden which was abnormal. he was Sasori, he didn't GET shy, especially near men.  
The blonde, Deidara, stuttered a bit indicting that he was nervous which Sasori was used to. After introducing his name, Sasori waited for the blonde to do something but all Deidara did was stare which was getting annoying. Suddenly Sasori had an idea. Not that he was into guys EVER and Deidara wasn't an exception but why not have some fun? Sasori loved to make people feel inferior towards him. Showing Deidara his best dazzling smile, Sasori worked his charm.

"So un, did you like the show? It was one of my favourites, took forever to sculpt that eagle un." Sasori could tell that Deidara had a passion for art  
"It was... Ok, I thought the sculpture and painting were beautiful but why blow them up? They would've been better if they were eternal and everlasting so their beauty can been seen over and over again." even though Sasori was trying to mess with the blonde, he knew immediately that he had insulted him when the bomber looked livid.  
"Well Sasori un, if you think art should be everlasting and eternal, your are truly mistaken. Now, good day to you un, I must speak with TRUE artists." and with that, Deidara turned around and went to some very pretty brunette.

Sasori just stood there, not knowing what to do. He just got blown off by Deidara, Sasori NEVER got rejected by anyone, especially not some fucking ass blonde who had no clue what art was! It was Sasori's turn to be enraged.

Sasori was now beyond pissed and decided that since he was too angry for anything, he would head back to the base. It wasn't really a base, more like a really big house where eight people, including himself, lived. Walking back in his Audi, Sasori tried to forget that annoying kid that pissed and rejected him. Oh well. Once in the driveway, Sasori went to open the door when he ducked, narrowly missing a knife that was thrown at this head.  
"What the hell is going on?" Sasori hollered.

Right away, it was silent, all shouting and fighting stopped. It truly was a sight to see, near the kitchen* was Madara and Itachi in their boxers with sharp objects clutched in their hands. They looked at each other with impetuous passion. In the living room was Hidan and Kakzuz playing strip poker, almost naked. God, sometimes everyone was just so damn childish which pissed Sasori off even more.

(Sasori POV)

I went upstairs to find Pain to tell him that the package was delivered and was successful. Seeing that Pain-Sama was doing some paperwork, it looked like the best time to approach him, I also had some other...stuff on my mind that I needed to ask about. Opening the door, Leader went right to it.  
"Was the package delivered successfully?"

"Yes leader-Sama, but fuck, why the hell was that sna-Orochimaru so happy about this damn package? He didn't even try to pull one of his tricks." I had to know what that pedophile would do with the drugs and why was it so freaking imprtant!

Pain looked a little irritated with my question but curiosity got the better of me.

"It really isn't any of your damn business but since you're so eager to know, let's just say that if and when Orochimaru is done with his experiment, there will be a revolution and when that happens, the ones close to him will be reworded greatly. Now as I was saying, do NOT pry and stay out of what does NOT concern you." Pain was trying to stay calm but I saw that this was a touchy subject so I left it be, going onto other topics.

Pain was waiting for me to leave but once he saw that I wasn't going to leave, he sucked in a sigh and looked at me, giving me permission to talk about my matters.

Taking a breath, I _tried_ to act submissive.

"Pain-Sama, I would never ask this of you but this is very important...' I sucked in a breath, better now than never. "I would like to attend the Konoha privileged arts university, I need a collage degree and it will be a good way to sell more.."

Hoping my pitiful excuse was enough I waited for Pain to explode, throwing me out and just to be plain pissed off but none of that happened. What happened surprised me, Pain smirked. Right then and there I knew I was screwed over.

"I think that would be a wonderful idea. It will also give you an opportunity for another 'mission'."

"..."

His smirk only grew in size.

"There are these two gentlemen that I want you to keep a close eye on, they have exceptional talent, and may be very useful for the Akatsuki." Pain watched my reaction which was vacant, he continued.

"You and Kakzuz will be going undercover and keep an eye on this two, you will then convince them to join us." There was a pregnant pause, and nothing more was said for minutes.

"Who will these two be?"

Another sly grin was planted on his face,

"You will be looking over your new partner, Deidara Iwa, He specializes in bombs and has a very precise throwing aim, he never misses..." Leader-Sama kept on talking but I tuned out the rest. the only thing I could think about was,

'Yup, so damn screwed.'

* * *

*so this is what the layout of the house looks like, You walk in the front door and right away is a huge living room, just on the right is a huge kitchen, no wall. There are stairs just left of the kitchen that leads to all the rooms, (AN: partners have to share rooms)

Omg I am so sorry, I was going to post this up like way sooner but I didn't even know where I was going with this story then I had to visit my grandparents who are so old fashioned with no internet.

K, So I have a couple of things,

What do you guys think of this chapter? Think that it goes with the first chapter? I'm not sure but I'm happy with how it ended, I just figured out my story line, super excited

second thing is I'm sorry for the mistakes, I took my time but most was done on my IPod.

Thirdly is I really need a beta so if you are interested just tell me :)

That is about it, R&R, it makes my day and it inspires me to write faster. PS I would love flame, I want to get better at writing so any criticize would be very much appreciated.


	3. Chapter 3

The day went by a little slower than usual, by the time Deidara got home; he was having a slight panic attack.

Maybe it was because he didn't want to see his dad passed out drunk on the kitchen floor, maybe because he was still thinking of that red head that pissed him off, or maybe it was because of the letter in his hand.

'Ok, Deidara, you can do this, just rip open the letter and see what it says, just breath.' Slowly, very slowly, he ripped the envelope and took out the letter. Another shaky sigh and looked down the page, only to keep reading and slowly he felt all the weight lift off his chest, he grinned.

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Hidan decided that drinks were in order for the good news. Going to Deidara's house, he went to the front door to knock only to be met with screaming.

'What the?' All of a sudden the door opened and Hidan was met with blonde hair crashing into him. Without the proper warning, Hidan and the bomber fell over and onto the dirt.

"Deidara are you ok!" Knowing that when there was screaming inside the house, Deidara would usually be pretty beat up and by the looks of it, he wasn't far off the mark this time. The closer Hidan looked, the better he could see that the blonds face was stained with tears, his right eye was starting to go purple and the usually tanned boy was now pale and slicken with sweat. Forgetting the reason he had come over here, Hidan immediately picked himself up and started to carry Deidara bridal style.

"Deidara, what happened to you?'

"..." Deidara couldn't look Hidan in the eyes, he felt so ashamed of what happened, it was his entire fault, if he hadn't been so stupid, none of this would have happened. There was no one else to blame but himself.

Hidan knew completely what the broken boy in his arms was thinking.

"Sunshine?" Hoping that the affectionate name would gave him a response, still, nothing happened.

Hidan again sighed and looking back at the house, he put Deidara into the back seat and started to drive, hoping to go as far away as he possibly could from the house that held so many painful memories for his friend. Looking back at Deidara, Hidan couldn't help but wipe away the tears that were threatening to spill...This was it, Deidara had been pushed over the end again and whenever that happened, Deidara would become unresponsive. That would last for a while and then the blonde would seem to come back to life, at least, that was what Hidan thought the last time this had happened

Flashback

_Hidan and Deidara were only 15 when the first 'moment' happened. It had been an exceptionally bad week for the blonde and Hidan was worrying. The blonde had been unresponsive for three days now and wasn't eating anything, it was a challenge to get the blonde to drink but he had managed it, even if it was just a few sips every couple of hours. Deidara looked dead in Hidan's eyes. Sighing, the platinum haired boy walked over to the kitchen, hoping he could coax his friend into eating and having a few sips of water. When he got back though, Hidan was surprised _ _to see that the blonde was standing up, a smile on his face that didn't quiet reach his eye, Hidan didn't notice that smile though. He also didn't notice that eyes held a certain glint in them. Maybe if Hidan see these signs, he could have stopped what happened._

_It was a couple of hours after Deidara had seemed to come out of his trance. Hidan thought everything was fine. He was currently waiting for Deidara to come out of the bathroom so they could go out to eat but as time ticked on, Hidan started to get impatient. _

_'I wonder what's taking so fricken long in the bathroom, I swear to Jashin that if he doesn't hurry up, I castrate him. Sighing (Cause Hidan does that a lot lol) He strutted upwards, and knocked on the bathroom door. _

_"HEY DUMBASS, HURRY UP! I'M FUCKIN HUNGRY."_

_"..."_

_"...Deidara? You feeling ok? I didn't mean it, you know how I get when I'm hungry...Deidara?" _

_All Hidan heard was silence and...Did he smell copper? Hidan knew the smell of blood anywhere and was now starting to panic a little._

_"DEIDARA!" With no answer, Hidan proceeded to knocking down the door with his shoulder. What Hidan saw still made him gag to this day whenever he thought about it. Laying there in the tub was Deidara; two completely symmetrical slits marred his neck...Wait...Deidara...Blood..._

End Flashback

(Hidan's POV)

I remember exactly how Deidara looked laying in my bathtub; it still haunts me whenever I think about it. He's my best friend, always has and always will. It physically hurt me whenever I thought how close I was to losing him. You see, I've always been alone until Deidara came into my life. We meet back in grade one. I was the kid that parents told their kids to stay away from, and I can't blame them. Honestly, I was fucked up back then, still am, but no matter what all the kids said about me back then, my little blonde friend was always there for me, telling the other kids to back off or else he would 'bite their peepees off'...Ya...We were 'it' after that...Ok in our heads, but honest to Jashin, ever since we met, I never had suicidal thoughts.*

I was harshly awakened from my thoughts when I heard Deidara in the back moan. I felt so helpless like I did back then. To see the only person who cared about me in such a state was starting to take a toll on me. I had to get Deidara back to my house where I would have to watch him constantly, until I knew for sure that he would be ok and not be a danger to himself. It was again quiet when we got to the halfway mark to my house, no more thoughts that I could hide myself in.

When I pulled up to my apartment, I took Deidara and cradled him in my arms. He seemed so fragile and delicate. He looked sickly, his eyes blank, and honest to god, it scared me a little bit, wondering what he could be thinking...If he could be thinking about how to end his life. I sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time today as I trudged through the hallways leading to my door. My eyes watered from the thick stench that filled the air, leaving everything to look hazy. After I had...Left...My parents. I've had to defend for myself and right now, all I could afford was the crappiest apartment in Tokyo, there wasn't even a bathroom in my 'home' There was only four bathrooms throughout the whole building and currently only two worked.

Now inside, I quickly locked the door and out Deidara on the futon. It was hard to see since it was so dark but I couldn't pay my bills this month so instead of kicking me out, the landlord cut my electricity, damn fucking bastards.

One last sigh and I looked around for a blanket that I could put over Deidara, finally just settling with giving him my only cover on top of my bed, I'll just cover up with sweaters. Finally deeming that that was all I could do for him at this moment, I laid down on the ground next to the futon and waited for sleep to take me..."OH HARDER, RIGHT THERE IUKA I-AHH"

fuck.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoO

The next morning I woke up to quiet footsteps in my apartment, that was weird, there was only me and Deidara here today. I opened my eyes and looked around. By the counter was Deidara eating cereal, with a blank stare. I hesitantly took a step forward, not sure what to do. I wanted to ask Deidara what was wrong but not sure how to without making him withdraw from me again. I deemed that he looked ok for now so I just sat down on the couch, not really focusing on anything but at the same time, focusing on everything, Deidara wasn't going to go suicidal on me again.

(Deidara's POV)

I knew that Hidan was watching me, he tried to act like he didn't care but deep down I could tell that he was more than worried for me. It hurt me to see him beating himself up over something that he had no control over. It wasn't his fault and yet he was taking it all out on himself. Another person that's hurting because of me. I looked around one last time and headed toward the door. As my footsteps became quieter, Hidan began to focus on me again. He wasn't going to leave me alone for awhile but I really needed to pee! Hidan got up and we started making our way towards the two bathrooms in the whole building. Honestly, it was quiet disgusting to urinate in there, hehe urinate. Ya I was a child sometimes but don't judge! Ok, now that I'm more or less to my normal self, I really wish that Hidan would stop looking at me like that, kinda like how Orochimaru kept on looking at me back when he was our high school teacher. I don't know what happened to him, except that he was creapin on some kid Sasuke and got fired. Anywhore, lol anywhore, but anyway, Hidan was starting to make me feel uneasy. I went to relieve myself in one of the stalls but Hidan had other plans. I didn't know he was gay. Everytime I asked him, he would deny it but telling me to piss out in the open made me think otherwise.

I started to get hungry so me and Hidan went to get some fast food, I made a little money during my last art show, so we went to eat at Saigon Noodles. I was pretty hungry so I was quiet happy when we got there. I got up out of the car, running towards the door, limbs wailing everywhere but I couldn't help it, It was Pad Thai for fucks sake!

Once in there and acting a little more civil, Hidan and I settled down. He was still giving me weird looks but I tried to ignore him, focusing more on the speck of dirt on the table, it suddenly became interesting to me.

"Deidara, we need to talk about what happened." There it was.

"..." God, I felt horrible but I just wanted to break down when I thought about it.

"Deidara, please, I beg of you and lord Jashin that if you don't say something I'm going to enlist you into that The Meguro Counseling Center, you know I will." I didn't know what to say, what could I say? 'Hey Hidan, do you know what my dad does to me? Every day I wonder if he's going to kill me, no, actually I would welcome that, I'm scared that my life is in his hands, someday, I could become like that.' Ha, ya, like that would be a good conversation starter.

"Hidan, I don't know what you want me to say, He beats me, you know that but what can I do about it? Fucking nothing! You know why? He has my life in the palm of his hands, he holds me like I'm a fucking puppet. One jerk of his strings and I do his bidding, wither I want to or not. He OWNS me and it hurts so damn much. So I'm sorry Hidan if I don't want to talk about it so leave me the fuck alone un." God, I can't believe I just told him that. We were saved from any awkward silence when the waitress came and brought us our food. The speck on the table was becoming my best friend right now.

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

The drive back to Hidan's home was worse than back in the restaurant. I just wanted to cry right now but I refrained from doing so in Hidan's presence. I guess Hidan still didn't trust me because next thing I knew, I was laying down in Hidan's bed, even though it was only one in the afternoon.

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

(NORMAL POV)

Deidara woke up around five, he could distantly smell of burnt Chawanmushi. Deciding that it would be best to get up and mend things with Hidan so things wouldn't be as awkward, Deidara went towards the kitchen and grabbed a plate.

_CRAASH_

At the sudden noise, Hidan jumped and spilt all the Soiled egg over his only semi-clean shirt,

"WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM! I'VE HAD IT WITH YOUR ATTITUDE, SO HELP ME FUCKIN JASHIN IF YO...Deidara?"

Standing in the mess of broken glass, was Deidara with a smile bigger then Julia Roberts, which considering, is pretty freakin creepy.

"Deidara? are you ok?" Deidara didn't even look back as he ran out of the house.

As soon as Deidara ran outside, he ran towards the nearest train station. Paying for a ticket, Deidara only prayed that he would get back in time.

When Deidara neared his house, he couldn't help but feel his heart start to quicken its pace. All he wanted to do was crawl into a ball and comfort himself but he had to be strong, this was his only chance he had to be free of his father. Quickly sucking in a breath, Deidara slowly walked towards the from door, opened it and looked around, so far everything was turning out ok, swallowing his fears, he quietly walked into the house and into the kitchen, and immediately saw that the letter was still on the kitchen table. Deidara couldn't believe his luck. Running towards the table, he grabbed what felt like his freedom and snuck out the door. If only he knew that in the shadows of the night, a disfigured object loomed from the depth of the bushes, the figure couldn't help but smile, everything was coming along perfectly.

* * *

**Hello all my reader (Probably don't have a lot) But I wanted to say sorry and that this was way over due. I don't actually have an excuse except that I had no clue what to write and wasn't even sure if my idea was good enough. Anywhore, I have a few announcements to make**

**-First off, I still really need a beta so if you're interested the please PM me, It would help me out. **

**-Secondly, I would like to thank **_**Mitchi**_**, I didn't thank you in my last chapter but I really do appreciate the comments you have gave me so far and hope you keep on reviewing**

**-Thirdly, please, read and review, it would make my day to read what you guys have to say, it would totally make me write faster. Flame is welcome just, you know, just don't make some crap review saying I shouldn't write anymore cause you know, thats just not cool lol. **

**So I know that this has nothing to do with my story but just wondering, how many of you have been chased by a moose? Just wondering cause my mom did which was freaking hilarious. All you can see is two dogs and my mom booking it towards the house with a moose on their heels XD Made my day. **

**One last thing, I'm very sorry for grammar and any other mistakes. As I said, I need a beta and also Its like really late and I'm over tired so ya sorry. **

**R&R**


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